Four Types of Love

Four Types of Love

5:40

A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another: just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another. By this all people will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.” John 13:34-35 (ESV)

Anyone who does not love does not know God, because God is love. 1 John 4:8 (ESV)

Here in America and perhaps other parts of the world people do use the word love in a serious manner however, they also use it to describe their feelings for common items or situations. For example, people can say I love going to the movies, or I love pizza, or I love watching football. Of course, for many using love in this form is based on tradition and habit however, when you think about it, do you really feel it is true love when talking about pizza? Below, we will go over four types of love that are mentioned and referenced in the Bible.

Eros

This type of love is characterized by passion and intense desire based on the physical; on looks and on fleshly desires. It is interesting to note that this word on love is not used in the Bible however there are many references to Eros. Eros is God-given in its purest form however it has been manipulated (not in a good way) over time by sinful human beings. Throughout various societies around the world, with varying media influences, this physical type of love/attraction has not been utilized the way God has intended. There is nothing wrong with this type of love as long as it is being shown/used in the proper context of what God has outlined in the Bible.

One problem with Eros is that it objectifies people as well as objects. It likes to rely on physical appearance and the self-gratification one feels due to this physical attraction, as opposed to viewing individuals as God views them. Ultimately, no one wants to be loved based on surface appearance only. Everyone wants to be truly loved in a deeper manner. Eros can be beautiful however, when one allows it to consume them and not control its passion, it can be destructive for the individual and those around.

Philia

This type of love is characterized by brotherly love or friendship. It can be described as the love between friends or family members. This love is based on mutual appreciation, shared values, and a common bond. The verb definition describes it as having a natural attraction or fondness for someone or something.

This word is seen in the Bible once as a noun but over twenty-five times in the verb form. In knowing this it seems that God puts an emphasis on the action of this type of love as opposed to the concept (the noun) of this word. God’s definition of this type of love is opposite to the world's values, see James 4:4.

Storge

This type of love is familial love. A love that is natural and instinctive that is found within families, for example a parent-child relationship. In the parental relationship, this love is almost as if your child is a part of you, like an extension of oneself.

Another characteristic of Storge is that just like in parental love, the parent can love their young child without expecting the child to love them back. It is a love that is not about reciprocity, but it is an instinctive, intrinsic love that is shown toward another.

Agape

This type of love is characterized by selfless love for humanity and nature.  It is given without expecting anything in return. It is unconditional and independent. It does not require the other person to be likable or to love you back; it is a decision of the will. It is a decision to love even if the other person is an enemy. This word is powerful and is seen over 250 times throughout the Bible. It is a perfect word to describe God’s love for His children. Despite our flaws and faults, He chooses to love us completely and wholly and chooses to believe what we can become, despite our behavior and what we have shown Him. This is the type of love that many who have healthy marriages and have remained married have for one another.

Of all the various types of love we have, the greatest of these, of course is Agape. It is one that God longs for all of His children to have for Him as well as His creation. May we all choose Agape as we seek to show love toward one another.

Blessings, 

Angélique

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